Collecting Moments

Moments pass, or rather moments fly by without us even noticing. Should we consciously collect moments to find calmness and fulfillment?

In a recent blog post, Controlling Distractions, we explored our relationships with phones and how we can use them in a more meaningful way. Phones are often used to pass time and perhaps lead us to ignoring the world around us. Hannah recently shared a Mary Oliver quote on a post it note and stuck it to reception where it still lives now. The quote is as follows:

Instructions for living a life:

Pay attention.
Be astonished.
Tell about it.

Sometimes, Mary Oliver

Mary Oliver’s work can teach us how to find comfort in the quiet occurrences of the everyday. In a world where we are surrounded by white noise it’s all too easy to stop paying attention. Days blur by as we fall into the rhythms of life. As a result of this, we forget how to appreciate the small delicate intricacies of living. I can’t help but feel that we have lost our awe in the everyday.  It often feels as though that in a busy world, we try to keep busy and amongst the hustle and that we are tricked into thinking this is how to feel accomplished or satisfied.  

Our obsessions with doing and comparing our productivity and accomplishments to others bares us with a neverending weight of dissatisfaction, eventually we burn ourselves out. We forget to notice the pleasure in the everyday. The pursuit of productivity leaves us feeling unfulfilled, like we’ve never quite done enough with our days, but what’s wrong with enjoying a day for exactly what it is? Start to allow your days to unfold as they are and try to stop with our tendency to constantly optimise our time. Allow our free time to be exactly that, free time and time to rest. I think that collecting moments it’s a nice way to nurture this growth.

“Our days don’t need to be optimised, but simply occupied-that is, lived in, tended to, renewed.”- Madeleine Dore, I Didn’t do the thing today.

Slowing down, paying attention, collecting moments. 

On our podcast, Working For Progress, we ask our guests for five simple pleasures. We have noticed over time that these simple pleasures are simply that, a collection of small moments. A morning coffee, the falling of cherry blossoms, a bike ride to work. They are never overly complex, nor do they tell an astonishing story. Most of these pleasures may not have been shared with others or spoken aloud. But what they do reflect is the fundamental beauty in the everyday. Free passings of time that we should consciously indulge in more often. 

Let’s practice collecting moments that bring a feeling of joy and focus on them. It’s one thing to keep a log of these small moments privately on your phone but to tell others about it spreads the joy, broadens your attention and ultimately makes us more connected to the world around us. When we look without noticing, we lose our sense of belonging.

It’s time to start to enjoy those moments of nothing… Spend your time noticing the free sounds, sights, tastes of life. I shared this thought with Hannah and Dani, I asked them to collect moments in their days so that we could reflect on them. We invite you to do the same.

“A mind narrows when it has too much to bear. Art is not born of unwanted constriction. Art wants formless and spacious quiet, anti-social daydreaming, time away from the consumptive volume of everyday life.”-Kyo Maclear, Birds Art Life: A Year of Observation

We wanted to share some moments our team collected over the past week.

Moments Hannah Collected:

• Absolute silence and the realisation that opposites co-exists, war and peace, calm and storm, excitement and dread, hope and doubt.
• A smooth shell that fits to the body.
• New questions from my daughter showing her view of the world and her place in it is changing.
• The rhythm of the train on old tracks, clackety-clack.
• Waiting and watching for a porpoise to break the surface – it could happen in an instant or never or always out of view. The infinity of possibility, unable to look away, always searching. 
• The warmth of the first hug with new friends.

Moments Alice Collected:

• How fresh and cold the air felt this morning, it felt refreshing in my lungs.
• A chunky Robin.
• Sun hitting the dew on the grass.
• The sun setting earlier and finding calmness in this rather than dread.
• During my walk to work, I spent several minutes in the trees looking at clusters of mushrooms.
• I passed four people on my way home, with each there was an exchange of a hello or good afternoon. I thought that was wholesome. We should make more effort to do so.
• The feeling of missing bike rides.

Moments Dani Collected:

• Trees. So many trees to examine, get to know, look up and find out more about them. To sit with, absorb their calm, inhale their smells, charged by their strength.
• The colours changing with the new season. Not just the leaves but the sky and light too.
• The feeling that no one is really a stranger. We all share so much.
• Hugs from friends and family who are still happy to see me (even when it has only been a few hours).
• Long, slow morning chats with pals over coffee (and oracle cards).
• Random whatsapp messages reading I love you from friends for no reason.
• Watching dumping waves with equal parts trepidation and awe.

As always, thanks for reading. You can read all of our previous blogs by clicking here. Make sure you’re subscribed to our newsletters by filling out the form below:

• Posted on October 25th, 2023 in Uncategorised

Working For Progress

We recently took the time to record a season wrap up episode of our podcast, Working For Progress.

Reflecting on Working For Progress

Working For Progress was launched with the intention of clebrating our communities and sharing their individual journeys. We are lucky to have a community of creative people, all doing interesting work and who are also interested in the bigger picture. Their health, their communities, their impact on the world. It is important for us to connect through conversations about how we craft our working life and make progress. Each episode sees us ask our communities questions about their working life, the challenges they’ve faced and the progress they’ve made.

It was funny to think back to the initial awkward fears that producing and recording a podcast brings. We are forever grateful to our pals over at Glocast for allowing us to record our trailer episode with them. Perhaps without this as a date in the diary to record we would not now be reflecting on our eleven published episodes! 

We spoke at length about what stood out to us in season one and we really wanted to thank our guests for their honesty and vulnerability. Even recording a conversation with people that you know in a place that you are familiar with can bring nerves. Not to mention that using a mic can initially feel very intimidating. It has been a joy to listen to the intricacies of people’s journeys and without creating the space to reflect there’s so much we may have never known! The podcast has made both myself and Dani feel ever more connected to you all. Taking the time to interview each person has served as a valuable reminder of how important connection and conversation is. 

Dani reflects: “Each person brought their unique story to the conversation, a bit of where they have come from in terms of significant life moments which have impacted on what they are doing today. Thinking back, it was often a person or an interaction which profoundly impacted a decision or direction. Sometimes only with hindsight do you notice such influences.”

Working at the speed of trust

We also spoke about what we wanted out of the podcast. I really wanted to showcase all of the possibilities your working life can bring and highlight the turning points in people’s career journeys. For myself, I am very early doors. I have spent most of my working life in hospitality. I adore the world of hospitality but always desired something more stable without losing what I value. Before Tribe, I remember having this weird sensation that I was failing or doing things wrong and that I simply wanted more out of my working life. 

Coming to Tribe gave me the term value based work. It’s a privilege to work alongside so many people where value is at the heart of their working lives. At points in my own journey, value based work felt out of reach and at times it just felt like ‘a nice idea’. I wanted this podcast to highlight how many different avenues and directions life could take you. Career journeys are not always a linear path like you are told at school. For me, each episode really encapsulates this as each guest highlighted the journey and risks that they have taken themselves.

It was interesting to note how the support of communities and the right people at the right time came up alot in each person’s journey. Alongside this came trust and putting yourself in the relationship of trust to find trust. These seem to be vital ingredients in both navigating working lives and in taking risks. Here’s what Nasim Forootan said about the importance of trust: 

“It’s okay to trust and to open yourself up and be vulnerable sometimes with how you are feeling and what you’re seeing. Sometimes you need to have difficult conversations to explore the nuisance of things. Have faith that things will come out right. If you go into a situation with doubt, you won’t let yourself explore the relationship that could be. Trust is a really strong value for me. Trust is embedded in everything I do. When we work in organizations or when we look at community spaces and governments, it’s one element that is constantly broken. If we had a tiny bit more trust in each other the world would be a better place”-Nasim Forootan

 

The importance of community

Trust and honesty certainly became an overarching theme, both in trusting in yourself and the people around you. This is why coworking is so incredibly important. It’s not often in life you get to choose the people around you and people are such a strong and beautiful part of Tribe. Tribe is not just a desk to work from, it is the people that you’re sitting next to, have lunch with and stop for a tea break and a chat with. Coworking perfectly encapsulates the human need and want for both community and connection. 

During our chat, Dani reflected: “Think of Brene Brown’s saying, ‘It’s hard to hate people when you see them up close and know their story’,  it’s true. Bear with me, I am so far from hating anyone, especially this crew. But in a similar vein, the care and love I now have for each guest has expanded. To know them a bit more, to be trusted enough that they share themselves with us (and everyone who listens) is not taken lightly. We could easily brush it off, quite normal to be on a podcast and chat about your working life. But when people share their values, why they do what they do, what brings them a sense of belonging and awe, it connects us in generative ways.”

Bob Cummins of SODAK amply said during his interview that “Emotional safety is formed with people. If you’ve got others you can take the journey with, it makes risks easier”.  We hope that in listening to each of these stories you may find more confidence in navigating your own journey and not to feel scared of taking the necessary risks. Founder of Good Life School, Lorna Lythgoe spoke of this in such a beautiful way whilst reflecting on her on career journey :

“I felt like I had leapt off a cliff, I was falling and would occasionally land on a shelf. It was painful and scary and uncomfortable, which sounds like I’m saying don’t do it. In retrospect, now I know that was the growth and the career path, I started to gleefully leap off as I understood It wasn’t an abyss”- Lorna Lythgoe 

Keep working for progress

Most of all, our podcast makes us feel so very grateful for the communities of Tribe Porty and Keystone. We are so lucky to meet so many incredible people through these communities. It is an honour to share your stories. We want to keep showcasing you as the brilliant, incredible and completely normal people that you are. People who are real and care deeply about others and this planet. We hope that our little podcast helps you to stay surrounded by good people, keep true to your values and to keep working for progress. (Too cringe? Nah, we love it!). You can listen to all of our episodes, including our season wrap up by clicking here. Fancy joining myself and Dani in an episode? Drop us a line at: more@tribeporty.org

As always, thanks for reading. You can read all of our previous blogs by clicking here. Make sure you’re subscribed to our newsletters by filling out the form below:

• Posted on September 19th, 2023 in Uncategorised

Controlling Distractions

How distracted are you by your phone and is it worth your time?

A frequent conversation around the coworking table is the nuisance and distraction that technology, phones and social media brings. This stems from doom scrolling, to issues spurred on from social media and questions on how to ‘correctly’ parent technology. It’s a big multilayered problem and it seems the thread of desire is to find a way to detach. We want to remove ourselves from passive connection and stop being distracted by our phones.

Why have phones become such a distraction?

When we use our phones we are selling only our time, it’s often the moments where we want the time to pass that we fall into the trap. We are always wanting to be busy, we always want to be consuming, maybe it’s time to step back and let yourself be bored. Let yourself day dream and be alone with your thoughts. 

“Solitude Deprivation. A state in which you spend close to zero time alone with your own thoughts and free from input from other minds.”― Cal Newport, Digital Minimalism: Choosing a Focused Life in a Noisy World

So what are the real problems we cause ourselves when we take to our phones for light entertainment or to pass some time? A study in 2007 by Dr Martin Hilbert and Dr Priscila Lopez found that the average person is drowned in 174 newspapers worth of information everyday, across TV, radio and reading. It’s easy to assume that this figure is even greater today. When you consider how much information we receive everytime we pick up our phones you soon realise why it’s so easy to be overwhelmed by the doom and gloom in the world. Or more likely, you feel yourself becoming ever more detached and unresponsive. We have no time to form any true compassion or understanding as we are always onto the next big news story. 

Time to break from the distraction?

Gloria Mark, a professor of informatics, found that on average an adult working in an office stays on a singular task for no more than three minutes before switching tasks. We are tricked into thinking that we are great multitaskers, we are not- we are however very good at getting distracted and losing focus. Mark argues that especially during computer based work, instead of seeing a new tab, email reply or doom scroll as adding a new task, see it as adding a new distraction. This sounds easy but we have already programmed our brains to shift focus constantly, this is why we always are reaching for our phones. 

After 14 years, I deleted my Twitter account and removed the app from my phone. This was spurred on by the change to X, in a weird way the visual change prompted discomfort but also made it easier to delete and let go, so thanks for that Elon! Since then, I notice myself whilst routinely checking Facebook and Instagram my thumb automatically going to tap the Twitter app. My brain is fully in a trance, it’s terrifying! Another thing I noticed, whenever I think of something funny my brain frames the thought as a tweet. It’s like an ingrained desire and need to tweet it, again…terrifying! 

Make it worth your time

I feel like I do not need to delve into the problems around phones too much as we all experience it daily. I did consider counting how many times I picked up my phone whilst writing this piece but I feared it would be too shameful of a number. However, I do not believe that a complete detox, hiatus or banishment is the answer. Nor is blaming or shaming ourselves. I think it’s more important to consider the good things phones and tech can bring to our lives. Think of how much time has been saved through emails, online banking, google and life admin. We just need to be more aware and purposeful of how we use this tech. 

For me, it’s the small impromptu moments of time where picking up my phone is becoming a problem. The automatic reflex to have a quick look always turns into at least ten minutes of scrolling. It is entirely passive consumption and is the definition of needless. I’m really good at misplacing my phone, something I’m weirdly proud of. It means that it’s not constantly on my mind or in my hand. Now when I lose track of it, instead of hunting it down straight away I purposefully question why I need to find it? What do I need it for? Unless the reason is valid, like calling my nan or if there’s a fire that needs tending to, I do not bother looking for it.

Find the balance

‘You want to read a book, but you are pulled away by the pings and paranoia of social media. You want to spend a few uninterrupted hours with your child, but you keep anxiously checking your work email. You want to set up a business, but your life dissolves into a blur of facebook posts that only make you feel envious and anxious. Through no fault of your own, there never seems to be enough stillness.’-Johann Hari, Stolen Focus

By detaching from our phones, time alone can become more nourishing, remove the need to compare and focus solely on ourselves. Instead of taking to social media for a ‘break’ try out some meditation, a little day dream, a quick stretch or a wee stroll around. Maybe what you’re craving is in fact a quick brain reset! Choose to feast on your own life, instead of small snippets of others. Rember, tech is designed to be addictive but we can choose to have a more purposeful relationship with it.

HERE ARE OUR COWORKERS THOUGHTS, TIPS AND TRICKS! 

• APPS (the irony). A few of our members use apps such as: Niagra Launcher and Minimalist Phone
• Deleting social media accounts and using IRL or direct messages to connect
• Deleting apps that have no regular use or purpose 
• Removing apps from my home screen so that I would need to search for them
• Creating time limits for usage 
• Phone-free Sundays (it’s amazing how much time you gain!)
• Newsletters, I have become a big fan of newsletters. It’s a great way to consume meaningful and chosen content without the gateway to endlessly scroll. 
• Keeping a ‘lookup list’ I take note of things that peak my interest. I can then I look up these in moments of boredom without falling down the rabbit hole. Example: What is Suminagashi? Do bumblebees hibernate in houses?
• Setting alarms which signal times to not use your phone
• Uninstalling the app and using web browser versions (just to make it less accessible)
• Educate yourself on how the apps and algorithms work, as they say ignorance is bliss. Once you learn the ins and outs of how they can manipulate your attention, you might second guess why you use them.

Don’t forget, habit is key and habits are harder to break than they are to form.

________________________________________________________________________________________

As always, we would love to hear your thoughts, keep in touch by signing up to our newsletter below! You can find our previous blog posts by clicking here.

Thanks for reading,

 Alice.

• Posted on August 24th, 2023 in Uncategorised

Take a Breath

Go on, I mean it. Take a breath with me now. A big chest opening deep breath. Feel good? Thought so…

The nature of this text alone probably reached you through an email, the ritualistic morning check of your inbox. Perhaps you even just got back from holiday and have been swamped with a never ending parade of virtual envelopes waiting to be clicked open. 

We are surrounded by unconscious actions, the most important of these is of course breathing. We take it for granted for the most part, to the point where a lot of us probably haven’t even thought about it for a while…

The only time I take conscious breath is when I see the sea, or a beautiful view. Naturally, times of awe cause us to become conscious of our breath. We feel our lungs expanding, filling with air becoming one with the nature around us. No distractions, just bliss. Interoception is the internal sensory system in which both physical and emotional states are consciously or unconsciously noticed and responded to. Obvious examples of these are sight, touch and smell. Breathing opens up a unique insight into our interoceptive processes as we are able to swap between subconscious and conscious control. 

Take a breath and meet your vagus nerve 

The Vagus nerve is the longest cranial nerve in the body. A healthy vagus nerve is integral to forming mindful responses to our surroundings and emotions. It is how you develop healthy stress responses and when you are in tune with this nerve, it can help counteract your fight/flight system. By incorporating breathing exercises into your daily life, you will become attuned to your vagus nerve. In turn, you can become calmer, compassionate and have a greater connection to your inner self. 

Think of how much time in a day we spend in short, shallow breath. These are arguably the times we need to breathe mindfully. However you stimulate your vagus nerve, you are connecting with yourself and tapping into mindfulness. 

“Whenever we turn inward to check in with our true feelings; to check in with our intuitive wisdom; or to find our true expressiveness, we’re lighting up the vagus nerve.” Dr Glenn Doyle

 

It’s as easy as breathing

Our initial response to anxiety and stress is often channeled through deep considered thinking. We play out worst-case scenarios in our minds and drown in negativity. It can also manifest physically through a tight chest and sweaty palms. Breathing offers a different approach to responding to stress or anxiety as it targets the body directly. By breathing deep and slow we can calm our minds and sometimes even gain immediate relief. 

“the vagal tone is correlated with capacity to regulate stress responses and can be influenced by breathing; its increase through meditation and yoga likely contribute to resilience and the mitigation of mood and anxiety symptoms.” –Frontiers

 

The vagus nerve is in direct correlation with our capacity to regulate stress responses. This response can be managed through conscious breathing. By stimulating the vagus nerve, your body is calmed and can even activate oxytocin release, this in turn can generate feelings of connection and stress relief. 

“If we’re breathing really shallowly and fast, it causes our nervous system to up-regulate and we feel tense and anxious. If we’re breathing slowly, it actually turns on the anti-stress response.”–Elissa Epel 

Humans are complicated, we are often drowned by our own thoughts, feelings and traumas. Becoming attuned to your vagus nerve unfortunately won’t fix everything. But, it may become a helpful friend. There are not many functions that we can choose to control, but we can control how and when we breathe. Next time you feel overwhelmed, overworked or stressed, try out some basic breathing exercises to bring you back to yourself and look after that vagus nerve. 

“In the same way that mindfulness practice isn’t just meditation, breathing as a practice isn’t just waking up every morning and doing 10 minutes of box breathing. It’s also important to be aware of the way you breathe in everyday life (or while you’re checking your email).”–Kira NewmanAT

 

Breathing exercises

Take the time now to try out some of these short desk friendly exercises, notice how your breath, body and mind feel. I think it is also important to not overcomplicate the action of conscious breath. Sometimes it is just as powerful to check in with your breath periodically through the day. As always, we would love to hear your thoughts on this, perhaps you already have some favourite breathing exercises you can share with us. 

Share your thoughts and keep in touch by signing up  to our newsletter below! You can find our previous blog posts by clicking here.

Thanks for reading,

 Alice.

• Posted on April 24th, 2023 in Uncategorised

Finding Your Ikigai

The Man Who Wanted To See It All

I recently stumbled across a documentary titled, The Man Who Wanted To See It All. It told the story of Heinz Stücke, in 1962 he left Germany and set off on a bike ride touring the world which spanned close to 50 years and covered enough distance to circumnavigate the world 15 times around.

What I found striking about this documentary is that Heinz did not set out to be the best cyclist, or the best photographer and any records that he broke were seemingly a welcomed accident. His soul focus and purpose were set on experience, connection, seeing and being. After leaving his home town in 1962, Heinz decided to not return home as he deemed going home as the end of his adventure. After over 50 years of nomadic living, this is where the documentary found its focus.

The documentary shows Heinz putting his memories in order and sorting through his tens of thousands of photographs, reuniting with family and friends and reflecting on his achievements and sacrifices. Something that has stuck with me since watching this documentary was how his friends spoke of his life journey. Friends from childhood reflected on his journey with great solace, they asked the question “I wonder if he is happy?”. The conversation felt heavy and remorseful. In contrast, the family that grew close with Heinz in Japan spoke of Heinz and his journey with tremendous joy and fascination, they remarked that Heinz had achieved Ikigai. But what is Ikigai and how do you find your ikigai?

“I consider myself a treasure trove, what I hope of the day is that it gives me the pleasure of finding something new” – Heinz Stücke: Home is Elsewhere.

What is ikigai?

Ikigai roughly translates to, a reason for being. The word itself is composed of two worlds: iki, which means life and gai, which describes value or worth. The word can be used similarly to happiness but ecompasses a deeper nuance. Ikigai is also about discovering your purpose and aligning your actions with this. If you have a clear sense of purpose, you can then align your sense of purpose with your values and goals. 

By thinking of ikigai in relation to Heinz, it’s easy to assume that to achieve it you must do something extraordinary, however the true meaning of ikigai is rooted in the ordinary. Ultimately, this practice allows for moments of happiness in each day, you can find meaning and joy in even the most mundane tasks. 

“I found the way of life I enjoy, and what is better than to follow a life which is fulfillment. The journey is my fulfillment.” –Heinz Stücke: Home is Elsewhere.

 

Using ikigai as a tool 

In Western society, ikigai is seen as a tool to achieve a long and happy life. A google search will show you a plethora of venn diagrams on how to achieve it with four overlapping qualities: what you love, what you are good at, what the world needs, and what you can be paid for.

This Western approach includes work and payment which isn’t necessarily the truest adaptation of the meaning. At its core, ikigai is as simple as finding out what makes you happy each and every day. When you ask yourself questions around the principles of Ikigai it is vital to curate answers about you and your soul, not your work.

Of course I agree that you can align the principles of ikigai with your working life in order to achieve happiness and satisfaction in all meanings of the words. Nevertheless, I think it is wrong to consider your work when asking questions around ikigai. Ikigai is deeper than your work, it is about you, your inner being and how to nourish your soul. Once you have answered these questions honestly, you can then apply these to your work practice.

“Japanese people believe that the sum of small joys in everyday life results in more fulfilling life as a whole”- Yukari Mitsuhashi

Asking the right questions to find your Ikigai

Your life is not limited to your work. It is only possible to find ikigai in your practice if your work’s values and ethics align to your own, your work must also actively nurture your personal growth and wellbeing. There is nothing wrong with the Western adaptation of ikigai and it can be used as a powerful tool to navigate and curate your working life.

Regardless, I think we should break away from ‘Ikigai in the workplace’ and instead keep it simple. It is far more powerful to get in touch with yourself. If you can find something in the everyday that makes you happy, brings you joy or a sense of awe you too can find ikigai. No matter how big or small.

• • What lifts your spirits?
  • What gives you a feeling of awe?
  • What are small things that you cherish?
  • What gives your life meaning?
  • What might you want to contribute?
  • What are you doing when you lose track of time?

Write down your answers to these questions and actively incorporate the answers into your everyday life. This is how to find and nurture your Ikigai and lead a happier and fufilled life.

“essentials to happiness in this life are something to do, something to love, and something to hope for.” – Hector Garcia, The Japanese Secret to a Long and Happy Life.

Helpful Links

To read more about awe, click here.

Want to find out more about Ikigai, click here.

To find out more about Hans Stücke, click here.

We post new blogs every month. To see more, click here.

Join us for our next Tribe Talks with Rise of Happiness to help create your path to happiness. To book your free ticket, click here.

Share your thoughts and keep in touch by signing up  to our newsletter below!

Thanks for reading,

 Alice.

• Posted on March 27th, 2023 in Uncategorised

Playing With Creativity to Find Fun

Why should we add creative play into our lives to find fun?

“It is in playing and only in playing that an individual is able to be creative and to use their whole personality, and it is only in being creative that the individual discovers the self.”

― Donald Woods Winnicott, Playing and Reality

Creativity is unique to each individual, it encapsulates many different forms, processes and connections. Creativity and play can generate an important challenge; embracing fear and your inner critic. We lose interest in hobbies as we grow older, arguably this is as they need to hold a greater meaning than ‘just for fun’. Spending our precious time on something, anything, must produce a worthy outcome and once play is lost from our lives, it is difficult to regain. 

A quick google search of the word ‘play’ will primarily show images of children playing, but it is just as important for adults to play too! The further removed we become from the idea of play, the more troubling the idea becomes. A purposeless activity becomes a concept that is impossible to grasp and often causes feelings of awkwardness. The average person has up to 60,000 thoughts a day and creative play has been shown to help focus the mind. Creative play and finding your flow can reduce anxiety, depression and stress. So why is it so alien to us?

Using Creative Play to find Flow

Flow is a state of mind achieved when you are fully engrossed in an activity. When you lose all sense of self and time, that’s flow. It’s been found that repetitive creative tasks can help you find your flow, tasks such as writing, knitting and drawing are great examples of this. Once you have achieved a state of flow, your brain becomes flooded with dopamine, the feel good chemical that helps to motivate you and ultimately will encourage you to repeat your chosen form of play. 

“…It is when we act freely, for the sake of the action itself rather than for ulterior motives, that we learn to become more than what we were.”

― Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, Flow: The Psychology of Happiness

Using Flow to encourage Play

Having fun with creative play is often seen as a nice idea, but we are at a loss as to where to start. For most people, it’s been so long since they last played, they have forgotten altogether how to do it. Whilst it is a nice idea, we are no longer sure what it means to play. In the words of Maya Angelou, creativity is a bottomless pit: ‘The more you use it, the more you have’. Creative play becomes even more important as we age and as our lives get busier. When embracing play, it is important to remember that the act of play must be deemed as being more important than any form of outcome. Most of all, creative play should bring you joy, you should engage in play to immerse yourself in a moment to moment experience. 

“Life without play is a grinding, mechanical existence organized around doing the things necessary for survival.Play is the vital essence of life. It is what makes life lively.”

― Stuart Brown, Play

 

Growing Down to find Fun!

Often, we recognise that people benefit from free spirited play such as dancing, scribbling or writing but cannot see the point in engaging in it ourselves. Art in any form wears a veil of elitist mysticism. If you view yourself as an ‘outsider’ to the culture, it becomes even more difficult to engage with it. Instinctively, we lean into these feelings of imposter syndrome by becoming more concerned with the physical outcome than the positive internal feelings the act brings us. Creative play is not about making great art, or a great piece of writing, it’s about finding your flow and happiness.

I think sometimes we need to grow down, free ourselves from the constraints of what it means to be an adult. Let yourself indulge in silly fun and stop thinking about what is and isn’t possible. Be in the moment, open your mind, find your flow and remember, the act is more important than the outcome.

Need Some Inspiration?

• 100 day challenge
• Attend a local Workshop or a Class to help with inspiration and motivation. (The first time is always the hardest)
• Take 20 minutes of each day to play, this could be through free writing, doodling or playing a game.
• Move your body, pop on some tunes and have a mid-afternoon boogie. Don’t be shy!
• Most importantly, decide what fun means to you and make the time for it.

Share your thoughts and keep in touch by signing up  to our newsletter below!

Thanks for reading,

 Alice.

• Posted on January 30th, 2023 in Uncategorised

Kindling Resolutions

As we come into a new year, it is a natural time to reflect and look ahead. Have you thought about what makes a good resolution?

When considering a new resolution, an idea that is often overlooked is to rekindle something that has previously bought joy. Often a resolution involves taking something away, be it a guilty pleasure or bad habit. I would argue that a good resolution should instead breathe positivity.

It is important to balance thoughts between what has already passed and what to consider next. The pressures of New Year’s Resolutions can sometimes cause unruly thoughts, leading some of us to opt-out. Why panic into setting a resolution you do not feel attached to. A successful resolution must be considered and nurtured.  A new year does not have to mean a new you.

‘There is no new world that you make without the old world.’-Jane Jacobs

Perhaps we should take more time to consider the joys of the past and how we can rekindle them. During my childhood, I spent many hours in a small cramped shed full of crafting materials, paints, fabrics, a real treasure trove! Consequently, art was always my favourite subject at school.  I was fortunate enough to continue this into my adolescence by attending art school. Despite being blessed with a wealth of creative space for the majority of my life, I’ve noticed it fade away. I no longer attend any form of art class, I rarely pick up a camera and the only time I bring myself to draw something is to make a birthday or christmas card. It’s a joy that I no longer make the time to nurture and explore. 

‘Mankind now possesses for the first time the tools and knowledge to create whatever kind of world they want’ – Robert D. Putnam

It’s easy to throw excuses of time, space & money. To be honest the route cause for me is the distraction of life. I very recently had several rolls of film developed, an accidental archive of the past five years of my life. It was melancholic to see the physicalities of time causing a love to fade. The intervals of time widened between each photograph.

Self care is all about making time for these loves and it would be valuable for us to all set a resolution in a similar fashion. Take the time to think of practical ways you can re-embody old hobbies, crafts and joys. 

Here at Tribe Porty, we strive to create a space where you can achieve these goals. Achieving your goal is unique to yourself. It can be as small as making a public declaration of what you would like to rekindle. Maybe it’s forming a circle of friends at Tribe to gather and participate in a shared activity. It could even be joining a local club or spending ten minutes a day working on some yoga poses.

Here are the resolutions we are going to nurture and how we plan to rekindle what brings us joy.

Alice:

ART! Art for myself, with no intention of publishing work, sharing or selling. Making art completely for myself. I’ve always loved collage and I have always naturally drawn to it, collecting and making materials and curating them together. To rekindle this love,  I would like to host an Art Club at Tribe, an open space where we can come together, laugh, chat and create.

Hannah:

Often my New Year resolutions default to restarting that thing I used to enjoy, making time for it, re-joining the class. And often they fizzle out in the first month. What was once a habit nurtured by the circumstance of the time, now, no longer fits so neatly in the evolving balance of work, family and friends. I still yearn to reconnect with these lost loves but more care and consideration is needed to imagine how they might be supported in today’s version of my life. 

In 2022 my creative practice of 14 years officially dissolved with the end of being self employed. One obvious rekindling would be to find time and space for creative play for myself. Sewing in particular. My daughter asked just the other day ‘Mummy, when will you sew again?’. My reply was when I can make space for the sewing machine and cutting table. This is a big dream and one that fits into the longer days of summer, or at least once I have cleared the post Christmas detritus. 

But thinking about my environment now, there is space, so long as I say “yes, let’s do that now” rather than “perhaps tomorrow when there is more time” to the requests of my children to get out the new modeling clay or paint or pompom maker. I too can sit at the table and join in. At first it may be Fimo charms, but with repetition a habit may form, the environment will subtly shift to support those yes’s being a bit easier to say, those trousers might get made.

What about you?

Jumping from this text, what do YOU want to rekindle this year? Share it with us and we will check in with you in a couple of months…Not sure where to start? Try out some of the free workbooks provided by our partners Keystone Women. Click here to download helpful materials to help you reflect, take stock, relax and plan.

Share your thoughts and keep in touch by signing up  to our newsletter below!

Thanks for reading,

 Alice.

• Posted on January 4th, 2023 in Uncategorised

Conscious Christmas

Last week I vocalized my first gripe over Christmas gift buying. It was a blustery day and I told myself after work I would venture out to the dangers of Princes Street to hunt for gifts and finally start checking people off the list. My friend’s response was not what I expected, “oh I stopped doing that years ago”…I had to ask for clarification, “yeah just one year, enough was enough and I explained to friends and family I would no longer buy Christmas gifts”.  Is it possible to find a balance and not over consume during the Christmas period, does a conscious Christmas exist? 

Manufactured Desires

I’ve never felt quite so jealous of someone else’s relief from such a trivial conundrum. I don’t think I ever considered the fact that you could just…stop. It made me question why we do it to ourselves? Perhaps it’s like everything in life, the virus of capitalism has leached onto everything. Instead of being content with giving one thoughtful gift we are plagued by thoughts of ‘I didn’t spend enough’, ‘it should be more than one gift’, ‘what if they spent more than me’, ‘what if they think I don’t care’. None of these thoughts are very Christmassy and at the heart of it, your loved ones would never think such things of you.

“It is another of consumerism’s ironies that, although it functions like a mental trap, we often think of it as an escape.”  ― J.B. MacKinnon, The Day the World Stops Shopping: How Ending Consumerism Saves the Environment and Ourselves

Over Consuming Christmas

Personally, I don’t think I could take quite a drastic leap, and whilst I wouldn’t label my friend a Bah Humbug, I simply love Christmas too much to not gift give. However, I find myself extremely frustrated over the wasteful and excessive way we consume Christmas and we should definitely become more conscious over the Christmas period. Consumerism and the environment go hand in hand, the more we consume, the more we produce, the more we waste. It’s times of the year, like Christmas, where we should definitely be consuming differently, and not as much.

We’ve all had our fair share of Christmas presents where their only purpose was to generate, at best, a 30 second laugh. They then spend the rest of their life in a junk drawer, or collecting dust on a shelf only to end up in the bin or at a charity shop. I see gift sets from chain retailers in the same light. Ultimately, you are paying for Christmas themed packaging which again…goes in the bin! 

So how do we all take steps to reduce wasteful consumption? Gag gifts can be a hoot, but can be sourced responsibly via charity shops or even ebay. No, your friend with a leaky gas pipe does not need a fart button. At all costs, avoid the boring, and frankly sexist, gifts for him or gifts for her sections. There’s a reason these types of gifts and gift sets dramatically fall in price post Christmas (it’s because no one wants them). 

Money, Money, Money!

British shoppers are expected to spend £4.4bn less on non-essentials – a fall of 22%. 

Without ignoring the elephant in the room, we are of course in the midst of a cost of living crisis. If unanimously we are spending less on Christmas, how can we also allow our money to have a greater impact on our local economy. Easy, spend it locally. And when I say locally I don’t mean Fort Kinnard because it’s down the road. Turn to our independent traders, local shops! Treat our friends and family to smaller gift parcels full of delights. Ultimately, these traders may not make it without our support. You may already be thinking about how these shops are too expensive, but again, perhaps we need to adjust our expectations for gifts. Quality over quantity! 

Yes you may be able to get more ‘bang for your buck’ by buying gifts from chain retailers, but think of how much further your money goes when supporting a local business. Not only does your lucky receiver gain a beautiful, thoughtful gift, but you actively supported our local economy. Without sounding ungrateful, I find nothing more frustrating than receiving a gift that I know I won’t use. I’m sure we can all agree that one thoughtful gift is far more wonderful to receive than a big pile of consumer goods that are eventually forgotten about. 

Do It Yourself.

There is always the calling that a DIY christmas is the way to go. Undoubtedly, with energy costs on the rise, a vat of homemade chutney may no longer be the answer we’re looking for. We can definitely be a lot craftier in our quest for gifts. Perhaps we also should stop frowning upon the idea of second hand gifts…When it comes down to it, what are the real differences between a charity shop book, and a new book? Or a toy? A scarf? I’d argue that the only difference is our disdain towards giving something that has had a previous life.

In reality, imagine the cost of purchasing a variety of toys, books and games for a child and simply rejuvenating it with thoughtful and crafty wrapping? Who doesn’t love a hamper?! There’s no reason the hamper couldn’t be made up of second hand buys… You can find some more ideas for this here. 

“Under capital’s growth imperative, there is no horizon – no future point at which economists and politicians say we will have enough money or enough stuff. There is no end, in the double sense of the term: no maturity and no purpose.”Jason Hickel, Less is More: How Degrowth Will Save the World

I don’t believe there is a right or wrong way around these conundrums. Christmas gift shopping is already hard enough without jumping through extra hoops. Society screams at us to be more eco-conscious, to save local businesses and still please our loved ones. Nevertheless, we should consider what our favorite gifts have been. How and why did they spark joy or find purpose in your life? Consider the journey the gift will go on after it has been received. By applying a few of these thoughts to our gift giving this year, we will ultimately have a more conscious christmas! 

A practical guide, things to remember whilst Christmas Shopping:

Quality over quantity. 

Reuse, recycle, do not fear second hand and charity shops.

Dedicate some time to look around independent shops.

Want to support some Tribe Members? Check out our Christmas Newsletter which features a gift guide full of ideas and gift cards. 

Share your thoughts and keep in touch by signing up  to our newsletter below!

Thanks for reading,

 Alice.

• Posted on November 30th, 2022 in Uncategorised

Curating Habits

It’s all too easy to reflect on time past as lost or wasted, the consequence of losing time only becomes apparent during moments of guilt based contemplation. Guilt causes us to value lost time to a higher level than the time we still have ahead of us. But perhaps this perpetual way of thinking is too caught up in regret and therefore we continue to waste time rather than build sustainable change to obtain our desires and goals. It’s easier to overestimate the power of the past and therefore underestimate the value of small changes and habits to daily life. 

I had not considered the power of small habits until recently, this realisation came from an enormous change in the routine of my work life. I had spent the majority of my adult working life sacrificing a minimum of 40 hours a week to a physically and mentally challenging job. On top of that, I received my rota a week at a time, usually a day or two before the week started. The notion of habit and routine was impossible for me to obtain due to these constraints. The impact a lack of routine had on my physical and mental wellbeing was not unnoticed…definitely suppressed. When I think back to this lifestyle a quote from Bruce Tift rings true: “we don’t have to consciously participate in what it’s like to feel claustrophobic, imprisoned, powerless, and constrained by reality.” I felt as though I was down a rabbit hole with no idea how to get out. I needed more good days. 

Personal time became a sparse luxury, when not at work I either needed to clean my flat, do laundry (AGAIN), or simply turn my body off and enter the abyss that is reality television. It wasn’t living, it wasn’t even surviving, it was simply existing. After having a sad and almost existential realisation that my work was the root cause of my unhappiness, changing my job became a necessity. Fast forward a year and two jobs later I finally found myself in a job that gave me TIME! Beautiful time! What did I do with this time?! I watched more TELLY! I mean…c’mon it was well earnt and a new series of Euphoria was calling my name. This didn’t last too long as I was well aware that this time could be better spent. Having said that, it’s just as important to know when to hibernate and recuperate.

“We often seem to dismiss small changes because they don’t seem to matter very much in the moment.” -James Clear: Atomic Habits.

The first small change that I made in an attempt to improve my wellbeing was to go to the gym. When I say I hated it, I really mean it. I hated the smell, the music, the sound and the look of the machines. Everything was monochrome and industrial. However, it became an important first step towards my ultimate goal. I wanted to become a runner. I knew I would never have the confidence to run in public without an improvement in my fitness levels. Even once I made it out of the gym and into the great outdoors, I kept running a well guarded secret. I wanted to protect my desire to run as far away as possible from the stigma of weight loss, this was not my goal and not my intention. I feared that outside opinions would push this unwanted pressure onto me and the public declaration of being a runner would skew my own vision.  

Why am I running? Metaphorically form the patriarchy, in reality for myself! Overestimating the importance of a defining moment is easy, it’s even more important to value small improvements that you create daily. Success and achieving a goal does not require massive action. For me, the reason I run isn’t to run a marathon, it’s to have time to myself, to listen to music, to be outdoors and see the seasons change…

Routine aided in me identifying as a runner, now I can’t imagine not doing it and i’m certainly no longer scared to say that I do it. James Clear prompts the celbration of identity as it is a form of intrinsic motivation, “It’s one thing to say I’m the type of person who wants this. It’s something very different to say I’m the type of person who is this.” Schedule the time and show up for yourself, routine will form confidence in your actions and they will therefore become sustainable and with time, unconscious. 

I felt that it was important to tell this story as it points out some fundamental things that first must happen in order to engage in positive lifestyle changes and become your ‘best self’. First, is your environment. This is both your home life and work life and acknowledging that a balance is needed. The second is motivating habitual practices in order to achieve a positive change. 

“Your goal becomes your compass, not your buried treasure. The goal is your direction, not your destination. The goal is a mission that you are on, a path that you follow. Whatever comes from that path—whatever treasure you happen to find along this journey—well, that’s just fine. It is the commitment to walking the path that matters.” –James Clear: Atomic Habits. 

When you identify a change you want to make in your life, or set a new goal the most important part is to make it a manageable change. If you set a goal that is too impossible to reach, it is unlikely that you will achieve it. Instead manage ambitions into smaller goals, this will enable you to change habits and generate sustainable progression. An unattainable goal will cause you to fall possibly at the first hurdle and therefore instantly lose motivation. Your habits must also align with your environment, looking back now I would not have made positive and sustainable changes in my life without changing my working life. 

It’s difficult to appreciate small changes and the creation of small habits because they do not matter in the moment. We’re all guilty of comparing ourselves to those who are already where we want to get to. It doesn’t matter how unsuccessful or good you are right now, the thing that matters is curating the time, environment and nurturing the habits. Once you’ve consciously made these decisions (and ofcourse stick to them), everything else falls into place. 

Curating your environment will expose many practical changes that ultimately lead to good habits and rituals. For example, I’m personally guilty of leaving my phone to charge on top of my ever growing pile of unread books. It’s as easy as charging my phone in a different room, by removing the distraction of a phone (and silly animal videos), maybe…just maybe, those books will get read! 

“Making a better decision is easy and natural when the cues for good habits are right in front of you […] be the designer of your world, and not merely the consumer of it.” -James Clear: Atomic Habits.

 

As we come into colder and darker months, it becomes even more important to consciously establish positive habits. Maybe it’s just as much about understanding the deep route of why you want to do something, or embody something? What does it bring to your life? I think without at least a curiosity to understand why, perhaps it won’t bring you the redemption you want it to. Is there a change in your lifestyle that you want to make? Ask yourself how you can create meaningful habits to build and shape your world. Write it down, break it down, enjoy the process of change and have more good days! 

“[Life] is a dance, and when you are dancing, you are not intent on getting somewhere. The meaning and purpose of dancing is the dance.”- Oliver Burkeman:The Antidote.

Share your thoughts and keep in touch by signing up  to our newsletter below!

Thanks for reading,

 Alice.

• Posted on October 26th, 2022 in Uncategorised

This Year’s Compass

Your current and future identities are shaped by your habits

“You do not rise to the level of your goals. You fall to the level of your systems.”

“Habits are a compound interest of self improvement.” James Clear 

“You must love the thing you want to change.” Jung

Looking through a pandemic lens- we have become different people

” As history has shown us, the effects of a pandemic are as much social, cultural and economic as they are about medicine and health. Our aim has been to deliver an integrated view across these areas to start understanding the long-term impacts and how we address them. Our evidence review – in our companion report, The COVID decade – concluded that there are nine interconnected areas of long-term societal impact arising from the pandemic which could play out over the coming COVID decade, ranging from the rising importance of local communities, to exacerbated inequalities and a renewed awareness of education and skills in an uncertain economic climate.”- The British Academy

So 2022, whatcha got? I am going to build great systems to create the best year I can.

So take that. 

• Posted on January 13th, 2022 in Uncategorised